Movies to See

Posted: March 15, 2012 in My Whirled
Tags: , ,

Movies to See

I used to write a weekly trivia column, and every week I would ad a short movie review.  Here are those archives.
By no means a comprehensive listing, but read the
notes and give them a view if you’re brave…listed alphabetically, use the jump menu below to go to specific letters.
(Last Updated November 27, 2007.)

a | b
| c | d | e | f
| g | h | i | j
| k | l | m | n
| o | p | q | r
| s | t | u | v
| w | x | y | z

Title Comments, quotes, etc
A Airplane I and II “I have a question.” “What is it?” “A
interrogatory statement, used to test knowledge, but that’s not important
right now.””The sun!” “What is it?” “A
large, fiery ball at the center of our solar system, but that’s not
important right now!”
Top American Beauty
An American Werewolf in London Scared the CRAP
out of me as a kid, still does. Nasty transformation scenes, creepy double
nitghmares, zombies.  Gritty.
Animal House  The modern Party Movie is born!
Apocalypse Now “I love the smell of napalm
in the morning. It smells like …victory!”
Apollo 13 “Houston, we have
a problem here” No shit. Try handling the math for Earth atmospheric
re-entry in zero g, near freezing, with a slide rule, in the dark.
Your “ships
is put to shame by today’s Ti-85 school calculator. You have to hit
a 3 degree angle, right on the horizon, within a 2-3 minute time window,
with only 10-15 seconds of power, all of it “full throttle” or
“off”, while looking out view port the size of a paperback book.
They made it, in real life. Only complaint of the movie, actual words
were “Houston,
we have a problem here” as I quoted above.
B Back to the Future  “You made a time machine…out of a Delorean?”
Bee Movie * Not quite worth the ticket price for a theatre seat,
this was still pretty funny. My favorite scene – grizzly bear in a courtroom.
Top Bettlejuice First time I got a crush on Winona Ryder (hey, I was
the right age).
The Big Red One (“Among the films that shouldn’t
be lost in the rush to praise are Samuel Fuller’s harrowing BIG RED ONE,
– “the only glory in war is surviving”..Maitland McDonagh”) Has
Lee Majors and a young Mark Hammil (yes, “Luke” in WWII with a rifle,
and no light-sabre)
 Blade Runner Its
…about killer synthetic people (clones?) from Mars. Or Jupiter. I
which planet, but with that theme who could go wrong? an d… a LOT more..just
kidding I know the movie well. Its great.
The Blues Brothers Yes, that is Carrie Fisher
aka Princess Lea, with an M-16
Blue Velvet written and directed by twisted psychopaths;
very intense story
Das Boot – (U572 (?) ok as well)
Born on the Forth of July  Tom Cruise before he got all weird….
Braveheart Great show, violent, historical, tragic
tale. Mel Gibson goes batshit insane after the next film he makes, “The
Patriot” which is neither good nor bad enough to list here. He now looks a lot
like Sadaam Hussein.
Brazil – “Have you got a 27-b stoke six?””
…it’s like 1984 mixed with Monty Python …twisted and rather dark,,,,
A Bridge Too Far
Brothers Grimm actually its corny, but so long as you understand thatthey
added many scenes to appeal to mass markets, its fun. not deep, but fun.
also finds this on the movies to avoid list
C Cast Away who thought two hours of Tom Hanks would
be so entertaining? And they actually show the aftermath of rescue, what
happens when he gets home…you really feel for him. They feed him fucking
sushi and crab when he gets off the Island.. where he ate raw fish and
for years just to survive.
Caveman With a “Beatle” (Ringo) and Shelly Long, ..and lots of
terrible jokes and worse costumes and..its actually pretty funny.  “Special
Effects” could have been done in a high school, even when this was made.
Children of Men Disturbing premise, great performances. The scene where
a single crying infant causes hundreds of soldiers to cease combat is
Clerks (yes, its black and white)”I’m not even supposed
to be here today!”
A Clockwork Orange “Singing in the Rain”
will never be the same after viewing this Kubrick film
Cloverfield Kinda like Godzilla meets the Blair Witch in Central
(Jurasiac) Park. Really got to me a couple of times. I like how is
focused on the people, and their decisons and relationships during a
crisis, and not just on the money-shot monsters. It’s actually kind
of a love story.
Conan The Barbarian Mongol General: We have won again. That is good!
But what is best in life?Mongol Warrior: The open steppe, fleet horse, falcon on your wrist, wind
in your hair!Mongol General: Wrong! Conan, what is best in life?Conan: To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the
lamentation of the women!

Mongol General: That is good.

The Core This is actually an awful movie. However, it goes SO
FAR into awfulness that you realize it’s kind of a joke, and since NOTHING
is remotely plausible you have to watch it like a comic book movie, then
its fun.
The Crow <font > Great example of comic books to screen,
this ass-kicking good show also saw the “accidental” on-the-set
death of Brandon Lee, Bruce Lee’s son. Bruce Lee also died on a movie set
under suspicious conditions.
D Dangerous Liaisons
Top Dirty Harry “Go ahead, make my day.”
Donnie Darko “Why are YOU wearing that stupid
human suit?”… and watch it twice…or more
Doom This is also on my “don’t watch” list. Depends who you
Dracula (the one with Winona, wonderful cimematography, plus,
Mina and her friend, likewise the other female vampires, are hot)
Dr. Detroit
Drop Dead Gorgeous (watch carefully …twice
if ya need to. Its hilarious, and not a chick flick)
Duel – classic. Don’t let its age fool you.
Dune – (the Sacrifice Channel mini series)
E El Mariachi
Top Enter the Dragon
Eraser Head (or, as I
call it ‘Oh God Don’t Make Me Watch That Again’ but ya gotta see it
at least
Eric the Viking Yes, its Tim Robbins
Escape from New York
Evil Dead I – II – III One word, “Groovy”
Eyes Wide Shut
Euro Trip
The Exorcist(all)
F Fargo Two words: “wood chipper”
Top Fast and the Furious
Fear of a Black Hat
Le Femme Nikita (another of the ‘never re-made-properly-in-America-movies)
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off – Ferrari odometers do
not run backwards when the car is in reverse. “Bueller? Bueller?”
The Fifth Element surprisingly good; strange,
strange idea
Fight Club <font >Two words: “Rendering Fat”, just think
about having the best imaginary friend ever!
4 Rooms
Full Metal Jacket
G Galaxy Quest “It has never been successfully
tested”. this movie got Tim Allen out of my imaginary iron box.  “Why
did it stop aat ‘1’?” “Because it ALWAYS stops at ‘1’!”
Top Gattaca Take the letters in the title, look them
up in a Genetics textbook, call me then. Its what we’re made of.
Ghostbusters I and II
Gladiator <font ><font > – Intense, not for everyone
Gone in Sixty Seconds Great fun. I prefer the original, but the recent version
is flashier.
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly <font ><font ><font >”Clint Eastwood is a bad ass”
The Green Butchers <font ><font > …mmmm..tastes like chicken. Also contains
one of the best lines ever delivered about sausage.
The Grifters
Grosse Point Blank <font ><font >”They said
I had a certain ..moral flexibility”
Groundhog Day  Funny as hell. “Sort of” a chick flick cuz it
revolves around a getting a girl sort of, but its weirdly Twilight Zone
ish and twisted in ways chick flick usually are not. See Scrooged, also
Bill Murray.
H Halloween  First one. damn creepy, musical score is some of
the best of the genre.
Top Heat Almost the best cops-and-robbers movie ever.
Heathers “Are you a ‘Heather’
“?… “No, I’m a ‘Veronica’ ” and “Eskimo”
Heavy Metal The Best Sci-fi Music Video Ever
Henry V Google “Agincourt” and you’ll
get the idea..good depiction of one of the bloodiest battles in European
Highlander (first one)”There can be only
I Identity  it actually surprised me..took me almost unitl
the final seconds to piece it together, even then Iwas not 100% right.
Watch twice
K The Kentucky Fried Movie uh, not sure HOW to
handle this one, you just have to see it. Not for kids.
King Arthur Fairly decent portayal of the “real” arthur, as opposed
to the HBO “excaliber” type or the Disney Sword-in-the-Stone or monty
Pythoon.  That is,
Arthurs a ROMAN, Gwen is a celt, pagan, paints herself blue.  Have
to say, blue is a good color for Kiera Knightly.
L Lake Placid – “I’m rooting for the alligator”
stupid premise in the same way “Anaconda” is stupid, but
done right and quite fun. you really do wind up wanting the alligator
to win,
despite its eating several people …basically its “black comedy” rather
than failed horror
Lord of the Flies just think, if YOUR junior
high was stranded on an island…kids at this age are UGLY
The Lord of the Rings (Fellowship)They did this
so well, it is scary, really scary and Lord of the Rings
(Two Towers)- I never thought it could be done…and Lord
of the Rings – The Return of the King.
amazing, just amazing
Lost Boys  Filmed in Santa Crus, I have finally
walked past the rail bridge Michales hangs from- its abot 15-20 feet
above a beach. Scary but safe fall.
Lost Highway Watch twice, there is weirdness going on
I still have not ironed out.
M The Magnificent Seven  One of the Best Westerns Ever, see also Good Bad
Ugly, Fistful of Dollars, some others,  feature many famous stars.
Mars Attacks “Ack! ACK ACK ACK!!!” Great
Fun! Universal sign of the donut.  Yodel-el-al-aedee-hooooo! <bang!>
M*A*S*H*- (the MOVIE) “they would ban the
TV show if the knew the words to the movie’s theme song”
The Martian Chronicles
The Matrix Think, ultimate white rabbit mind-fuck
The Matrix II, III , next Two movies gets a little messianic
at the end, but masterful!
Meet the Parents The cat CAN flush, you will learn later in a sequel.
Memento Cleverly produced whodunnit with a strangely disabled hero; whats even
creepier is that his condition is real, that really can happen to you.
Million Dollar Baby If you don’t want to get kicked in your emotional guts,
stop this when the big fights starts.  Pretends she wins.
Monty Python and the Holy Grail “He says
they’ve already got one”…”She’s got HUGE…tracts of land…”
“What are you going to do, bleed on me?
(Monty Python) The Meaning of Life  Always Look on the Bright Side of Life
Mumford Saw this long time ago, missed the beginning and didn’t
realize it was “Mumford” and liked it.  Saw
it again, still liked it.   Not a barn burner, subtle, but you
feel better in the end.
My Darling Beloved  Beethoven, got to love it.
N Natural Born Killers  You actual start to LIKE THEM, even after they
have casually murdered dozens of people; the still have a sense of humor,
strangely, do not kill randomly.  Their motives may be ..unpredictable,
but in the end, their ultiamte escape seems appropriate.
Top 1984  True to the book, very stark, harsh, ugly, appears
somewhat dated to modern eyes.
Night of the Living Dead (original) creepy as hell, and still make a social
statement at the end.
Not another Teen Movie  Some of the best satire in years. “You’re the worst
twins ever!”
O Office Space “Didn’t you get the memo?”
…”What about the TPS reports?”” .. “PC load Letter?
What the fuck does that mean?” …remember “the Bobs”(note: at work my team’s printer jams with a ‘PC
XL Error’, a FAX will jam when empty, we have four people in the
office named variations
of Bob or Robert
and a new employee named
– no
kidding- “Michael Bolton”)
Top The Outlaw Josie Wales – again, Clint Eastwood kicks some ass, young version
P Pale Rider – again, Clint Eastwood kicks some ass , old version
Pan’s Labyrinth Wow. Warning, it’s in Spansih with sub-titles, but wow.
This will make you beleive in faries. Sensitive types will be in tears
at the end.
Top The Perfect Storm  True story. Don’t screw around with Mother Nature.
Pi sorta like “Eraserhead”,
also listed on this page, but more cheerful
Platoon The first movie I saw about the war I just barely
remember.  To quote my great-great grand uncle William Tecumseh
Sherman, “War is Hell”.
Poltergeist  Never trusted static on a TV screen since.
Pulp Fiction watch it twice…Why do the French
call a McD’s ‘Quarter-Pounder with Cheese’ a ‘Royale avec fromage’?
The Professional Hard to put into words…make
sure you get the FRENCH movie
, not the crappy American STALLONE
Psycho (the original- just, well because..get this- it’s black
and white, but everyone remembers the blood in the bathtub as being red)
Q Queen of the Damned OK- this was actually a piece of
pseudo – horror fluff, but I went in with such low low expectations that
when it
actually wasn’t that bad, I was impressed.
R Repo Man <font >Look in the trunk….I
think its the same shit they had in the breifcase in Pulp Fiction
Top Red Dawn – <font >(just because of when I watched it,
commies attack US by air, land in CO, locals fight back and save the day?
This was shot in my old back yard practically)
The Hunt for Red October
 Reservoir Dogs “Everyone always wants to
be ‘Mr. Black'” (lots of twists, and a good deal of blood)
Requiem for a Dream (another, watch ONCE movie,
like Eraserhead. Don’t watch twice, for your own good)
The Ring really creepy ‘cuz you never see what the nasty
bitch actually DOES to people that kills them…its left up to your imagination.
Rivers Edge (see Longmont, CO for details on where they must have
done their teenager research)
Road Trip  Some of the best individual scenes ever, the mouse
and Tom Green, the jump over the river, the catfight, HA HA
The Road Warrior “Two days ago I saw a rig
that could ‘aul that tanker. You wanna get outta’ here, ya talk ta me.”
Rope One of the best by the best, Mr. Hitchcock
S Saving Private Ryan  Very real. Excellent entertainment, not for kids.
Shaun of The Dead I think this is possibly my favorite zombie movie. I
can watch it over and over, never stops being funny. Shaun gets a dart
stuck in his head!
Top The Shawshank Redemption “Never give up hope”
One of the best.  Kind of hard to beleive thats the same Tim Robbins
from ‘Erik the Viking’.
Serenity – based on the tv show “Firefly” this
movie did an excellent job at recreating the magic of the show and gives
some meaning to some parts that were cut short due to the shows cancellation
after only 14 episodes. The setting and mood is like …think the gritty
of The Road Warrior (Max was a violent but basically good guy), with a
bit of A Fistful of Dollars, a bit of Gone with the Wind, a bit of Pirates
the Caribbean and the technology …almost of Star Wars, with out the aliens.
That’s right, NO aliens! They curse in Chinese, and they are not afraid
shoot first, and well, they’re criminals. half the time.
The Silence of the Lambs Ewww….icky, icky,
icky. BAD Psychopath! “It puts the lotion on its skin.”
Sixth Sense A very good case of a “gotcha”
that you MIGHT see thru just before it gets ya..
Seven Don’t watch this during dinner..
Slacker – a snap shot of gen x twenty something’s
in Austin, TX few years back..
Smokey and the Bandit – made black camaro’s, Burt
Reynolds and Sally Fields popular..
Snatch Really Good, if you grok the lingo. Its
all a scam, from before the beginning…
Scary Movie series  II III  IIIII IVIVIVI  as below, but
much campier than scream, comedy.
The Scorpion King I know, its just hollywood fluff, but for some reason
I like The Rock. He doesn’t take himself too seriously. Beside, the “sorcerer”
is totally hot and is half dressed most of the movie.
Scream I, II, III – All are great fun, but are not quite paradies.
Don’t take too seriously, but they do feature very real gore and are
ocaisonally startling.
Scrooged “The bitch…hit me with a toaster!”, HA HA,
even tho its got a huggy-feely Christmas theme, its offball enough-..
drunks with shotsguns, mice with antlers, Bill Murray getting brained
by a ghost with a toaster…I love it.  Catchy theme music.
Star Wars -various titles..
Starship Troopers  Some of the best aliens and battle scenes.  Nearly
perfectly created the weirdo society where you must fight to vote.
T Taxi Driver “Are you looking at me?”
Top 2001 “Open the pod bay doors, HAL”
21 Grams – no, its not about drugs
Trainspotting a very…griity portrayal of life
in urban Britain…
Tremors “Broke into the wrong god-damned wreck
room, didn’t you?”
True Romance “Its better the have a gun, and
not need it, than to need a gun, and not have it.”
12 Monkeys not about monkeys at all….
The Twilight Zone
Twins Peaks – Fire Walk With Me
U Unbreakable
Top Unforgiven   One of the best westerns, ever. Gritty and real.
V Vertigo
W The Wall (Pink Floyd) Will be with me always..unforgettable…and
twisted, very twisted
Top Wargames “Would you like to play a game?
How about Global Thermonuclear War?”
Waynes World  Along the lines of
The Wedding Singer  Classic. “Love Stinks”, Adam Sandler at his best.
Weird Science  Every (male) teenage nerds dream
Who Framed Roger Rabbit “I’m not bad, I’m just drawn that way”
Wild at Heart – see True Romance for why the title
belies the story. Its a romance, but a non traditional one
(all the Woody Allen movies that I do like
and none of the ones that I think stink…)
Wrong Turn (note: this is not a deep movie, but it is a perfect example
of the genre- all the right people die at the right times…)
X X-Files  Only if you’re a fan of the series, otherwise,
its sort of trash.
  1. Mrs. Chili says:

    SO many of our favorites are on your list. In fact, I was sharing it with Mr. Chili, and he came up with many of the quotes you listed here.

    Our personal dialogue is made up of a lot of quotes from Apollo 13 (“You, sir, are a steely-eyed missile man!” is one of his favorites). He’s an engineer; the film gets him EVERY TIME (and no matter HOW many times I see it, and even though I KNOW it’s coming, the scene where Marilyn goes to tell Blanche about the accident and she tells her granddaughter, “don’t you worry; if they could get a washing machine to fly, my Jimmy could land it” makes me cry).

    Have you seen The Hunt for Red October? That’s another one of our foundational films….

  2. Sahm Ataine King says:

    13 Assassins – “He who values his life dies a dog’s death.” Shinzaemon Shimada
    Being There
    Kill Bill Vol I&II
    Seven Years in Tibet
    The RocknRolla
    What Dreams May Come
    The Dark Crystal
    Batman Begins
    The Dark Knight
    Slumdog Millionaire
    The Last Samurai

    I’ll stop here…

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